The Sunny Lifestyle of a Home Journalist

Friday, October 30, 2015

It’s almost Halloween. And although we don’t celebrate this holiday, I found something in the archives of my portfolio that would really go with the theme. Two years ago, I wrote part one in this series, and I wrote part two earlier this year. Part three happened only a week or so ago. They’re slightly exaggerated and dramatized versions of totally true stories. If you haven’t been following from the beginning, see part one and two in the series before you read this one.

Part III
We thought (hoped) that our tales of crawly critters were over after the roach and the spider, but we were wrong. On the very week before the scariest day of the year, something else came to visit us. It was another spider.

This spider was about the same size as the last, but at least it wasn’t under the table. I found it by the front door one night when the other girls were upstairs. I quickly called them down to share in my horror.

“There’s a huge spider down here,” I cried in warning.

“We have to kill that. We’re not going to bed until we see it dead,” was the unanimous response once they saw it.

This time, we started off with a new approach: death by shoe crushing. I grabbed a shoe from the shoe wrack, then Alicia quickly laughed in disagreement. “Uh uh, you’re not using my Nike’s,” she sassily commanded. I went back and selected another weapon that wasn’t brand name.

My first attempt to kill the spider by throwing the shoe was a failure. So were the next 4 attempts which followed. (Maybe if it would have been a Nike shoe…) We took turns and tried everything, from aiming with precision to throwing two shoes at once, but none of them even came close to hitting the spider, who we now knew was laughing hysterically at us in spider language. Alicia had dragged the piano bench over and was standing on that the whole time, which might have hindered her success, because “the spider couldn’t crawl up that.”

We could all picture a giant pile of shoes stacked up by the door by the end of the night, next to a totally alive spider. But we refused to give up.

“We are going to to kill it this time,” we tirelessly resolved.

So we went back to our old spider-killing method: Raid cans.

We found the very two we had used to (try to) kill the last spider, and Alicia and Audry wielded them. This time I was the coward. They came at him from two directions, at as close of range as their arachnophobia would allow. It was close enough and, because the spider didn’t start flying or jumping when he was sprayed, they kept up a steady stream of poisonous aerosol until he finally shriveled up (which took at least two full minutes).

Believe it or not, that’s the end. We finally killed a spider, and we’re quite proud of ourselves. Of course, no one had the courage to sweep it up until almost 24 hours later, and the front hallway smelled like Raid for days, but the goal was accomplished.

Surprisingly, this great feat has already allowed us to conquer greater ones. I came home two days later and saw Alicia calmly sitting at the table, with a dead mix between a spider and a roach on the ground not two feet away from her. “I killed it earlier,” she said, smoothly. It was drowned in a small pool of poisonous liquid.

Tomorrow I’ve got to buy new Raid, and put a few air fresheners in the house. But if you’re ever in need of pest control services, the Barrios girls are here to help. We become more powerful by the second, and if any more ugly creatures try to darken our doors, we’re pretty sure they’ll be sorry.

Hope you enjoyed my little series! What spider killing methods do you use? Good luck staying away from them; you know what tomorrow is!

1 comment :

    Perfect solution for anyone suffering from the traumatizing effects of a minor home invasion of bugs (who should exist only outside on terra firma) to seriously compromised dwellings by these horrific invaders. Like many people of today, bugs want an easier existence so they squeeze into human habitat to eat crumbs left about. Kind of like a bug welfare system; if you can get in, life is great! You need two things…a good man and a broom. Awesome! Dead bug!



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